communicati forms to go back and forth between co parents

COMMUNICATI FORMS TO GO BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN CO PARENTS HOW TO

This means, even if we don’t feel like it, we calmly and unequivocally tell our children that parenting time will happen. As a wise person once said, when our children are upset, our job them is not to join them in their chaos, but to share with them our calm. Some children get themselves so worked up they may even make themselves ill.

COMMUNICATI FORMS TO GO BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN CO PARENTS HOW TO

How to Respond to Tough Transitionsįew things are more difficult for parents than having their tearful young child beg them not to leave. If your ex wasn’t abusive during the marriage, it’s unlikely he or she has become so since your divorce. Don’t jump to conclusions just because your child cries at parenting time transitions. If you see evidence of abuse, or your child describes something troubling, pay attention and contact your attorney and, if necessary, the authorities. Of course, there is always the possibility of some darker reason that your child does not want to go with the other parent. The Child is Genuinely Afraid to Be With the Other Parent. If you’ve ever had a crying child pried from your leg by a preschool teacher, only to be assured that he or she was fine after you left, this is similar.

It’s entirely possible that a child who struggles with transitions will cry and cling for the half-hour leading up to the transition, but be completely fine once in the other parent’s car. Some Children Just Struggle With Transition.Īlso, some children, like some adults, just shift gears more easily than others. Remembering this all over again is very hard for small children, whose dearest wish is often to have both parents with them all the time. It’s also possible that the fact of having to leave for parenting time is a reminder to your young child that you and the other parent are no longer together. Parenting Time is a Reminder of the Divorce. Children are also put in a position of loyalty conflicts when they perceive that a parent is forced to permit them to spend time with the other parent. Children can be very protective of their parents’ feelings, out of love or a sense of self-preservation. This often isn’t even conscious on the child’s part, but sometimes an older child will deliberately downplay enthusiasm about an upcoming visit because he or she doesn’t want to make you sadder. What you interpret as your child feeling sad might really be a reflection of your own emotions about the situation. Children are remarkably good at picking up on our emotions and nonverbal cues.

Your Child is Reacting to Your Emotions.Īnother possibility is that your child is looking forward to time with the other parent, but senses that you are sad or conflicted about it. At the time of transition, your child may not be focused on how much he or she will enjoy being with the other parent-only that he or she is happy now, and is expected to leave that situation. Remember that children usually love both their parents dearly, and your child has just spent the last few (or several) days being comfortable with you in your home. It may not be that your child doesn’t want to go with the other parent, but that he or she doesn’t want to leave you. Five Reasons Children Might Resist Going With The Other Parent Your Child Doesn’t Want to Leave You. While concerns like these aren’t unfounded in all cases, you may be relieved to know that there are many other explanations for you child crying at parenting time transitions. You might even worry that the other parent is being abusive, especially if he or she tended toward anger and violence while you were together.

You may interpret this as your child not enjoying the time he or she spends with their other parent (and you may get a secret feeling of satisfaction from this, even as you feel bad for your child). What does it mean when a child cries at parenting time transitions, and what should you do?ĭepending on your child’s age, he or she may cry, cling, beg not to go, or even throw a tantrum. This can be stressful for the parent who is being left, who may not be all that enthusiastic about the child leaving to spend time with the other parent. Transitions between parents and homes can be challenging for children, just ask any parent who has ever tried to drop a child off at preschool! The transition of moving from one parent’s home to the other’s for parenting time can be even more difficult, and often, the child will cry when having to leave one home for the other.

Communicati forms to go back and forth between co parents